Alden's Birthday Day

I love doing stuff for/with Alden.  Like I put up on FB, he's so good, and so appreciative, it's worth it, he makes it easy to spoil him.   I wish we got an earlier start, yesterday. We saw most of the museum, only really missing out on the Rose Center, and the actual planetarium.  For whatever reason, the place was mobbed yesterday.  When Schuyler and I went, it was empty, we walked in, no lines, and most of the halls were nearly empty, which made for a pleasant meander. This was more hectic, and some things made me a little ranty...but overall it was an outstanding day.  I'll rant about them later.

We're getting more familiar with the trains every time we go into the city.  We've had a basic knowledge of certain lines, for awhile, but now, I can find where something is, and almost intuitively know which line gets us in the vicinity.  It's nice, after sticking to the well traveled routes, and taking cabs everywhere when I was a kid, to really range far and wide, discovering new neighborhoods, and good places.

Max Brenners was good, a little schlocky, but that's part of the experience.  I wanted Alden's birthday day to be a little over the top, and I figured what's more over the top than dessert for dinner?  We planned it out so we'd have a substantial breakfast, a light lunch, and then in place of a typical evening meal, we'd do a giant dessert thing from there.  It worked out good, and we didn't kill ourselves with sugar coma.  I had a churro fondue platter thing, Irv had an enormous cookie ice cream sandwich, and Alden had a s'mores sundae that wound up being the size of his head, which we all sort of freely shared around the table.  The kid loved it, Irv not-so-much, but I get the feeling that he's getting grouchier in general, as he gets older.  Sometimes, I think Irv is getting to be one of those people that looks for things to complain about, or is becoming more likely to complain when he's out of his comfort zone, or something.  Or maybe he's just been acting like that more lately for some reason.  It was a little pricy for dessert, but the food was very very good, and it beat the shit out of Rainforest Cafe, that's for sure.  

We moseyed around Union Square, walking around that neighborhood, checking out some stores, and walking off the chocolate, then headed home.  Had to stop at the only "local" Tim Hortons, and get some coffee, in Penn Station (Tim Horton franchisees, if you're reading this, come to Monmouth County, you'll have customers for life, just keep the coffee the same).  

Alden kept thanking us, sleepily, the whole way home, which is the greatest feeling.  Like, when you've nailed it, you know?  All the money, planning, fiddling with time and finances, really comes to fruition. When the kid can't stop talking about which exhibit was his favorite, or how he got to see Turkana Boy "in person", or how great the food was, etc.  He only got "spoken to" once, and it was because he was getting punchy at the end of the day, and losing his already minuscule attention span.  He asked if he could go in another room, and I said "give me a minute, let me look at this thing here, then we'll all move there together" and he trotted off, like I didn't say anything.  I didn't notice that he took off, at first, so I had the moment that every mother goes through, the "holy shit, where's Alden...he was just right here" moment.  So, when we found him a few minutes later, we made him take a time out, sit on a bench, and gather himself for a few.

All in all, it was a fantastic day, and like it happens every time, we get home and go "that was so much fun, why don't we go to the City more often?".

I think I'll save my rant for the following post.  

Five blogs that I've been wanting to write in the past two weeks, but haven't...

> Yes, I did say "mini Blizzard" you asshole, just because I'm fat, doesn't mean I want a huge mega-sized drum of your air whipped chemical shit fake ice cream.  So, don't for fuck's sake, goggle at me and go "MINI!?!".  Asshole.

>  I am very upset that I'm now allergic to tomatoes, and peanuts.  I have become one of those food people.  Ordering pizza has become an ordeal.  "A white pizza for Lisa", has become the thing, now.  I feel like an asshole, to be singled out.  I have to read labels, paranoid, now.  It's scary and frustrating, and limiting, and if I think too hard about it, it almost makes me cry.

> I'm frustrated about the homogenization of the gaming industry.  It's become mainstream, and now the big companies are pandering to the lowest common denominator.

>  I have been having hilarious dreams lately.  Interesting, frustrating and funny.  I need to blog at least, about the  one in the burger place.

> Perdurabo is an incredible biography, it's so goddamned good, but I worry about hero worship, like it's skewed.

Open Letter to the Unreasonably Miserly Fuck Sitting Over There

Disclaimer:  I'm angry at this moment.  We just had/are having a huge fight.  About what...what else? Money!  Things, hopefully will be cleared by tomorrow morning.

So, you say you're tired of hanging out with people on weekends.

I apologize for making plans for you, two weekends in a row, with something spontaneous coming up, for this coming Saturday night.  You forgot about the 3 weekends in a row before that, where we were bored to tears, sitting around the house drinking all evening/going to the bar on Sunday because we had nothing better to do.

So, you say it's because you get nothing done.

What do you need to do?  Clean the house?  It's spotless (because we're having company! Company clean!)  Work on yard stuff?  At 10 pm on Saturday night?  If that's what moves you, go do it.  Go do whatever, because it's mostly my company anyway.  You just sit around and drink, and unwind, mostly.  In fact, if I didn't keep things moving with my friends, that's ALL we would do. Sit and drink.  At the bar.

So, you say it's because of money.

Ah.  Now we're getting to the heart of the matter.  Money issues, I understand.  How about this?  I stopped buying spiders, video games, music, and tarot cards, this August.  (You wouldn't believe how much I spend on that stuff...hundreds.  a month.  seriously...)  Let me take care of it.  I usually keep things on the cheap anyway, using stuff from the freezer, manager's specials, whatever.  I can do a barbecue for 10 people for less than $50.  I can afford it. I'm working.

So, now you're blasting me, incoherently, repeating the above things, over and over.

"I have THINGS I need to DO!" you say, "THINGS".  What else can I say besides "go do them?"  Ok, how about quit spending a few hundred dollars at the bar every week and go fucking do these THINGS.  How about quit buying shit offa ebay, you're scaring me with this toy car habit, when every single day, really pricy tiny antiques show up in the mail.  Or, how about packing your lunch again, I buy lots of groceries, and plan for lots of leftovers, so that you can have a nice lunch every day, and every day, you spend upwards of twenty dollars on gourmet subs and breakfasts.  Or...how about you just shut the fuck up about money, you paranoid fucker, and let me handle my affairs (barbecues included) and I won't hassle you about drinking in the bar with your fucking loser friends every weekend.  How about let me continue to shop, and clean, and have my friends over, which you're allowed to totally ignore, if you so chose?  How about stop assuming every plan I make is an assault on your soul.  How about instead of inviting people here, we go out for dinner every weekend, like we used to?  Remember those days? Going to Portuguese Manor and spending $150 on steak and booze?  Hell, it was easy, and there was little cleanup involved. We certainly don't do that anymore.  Or, how about we cancel all our plans, with ALL our friends, and sit at home every single weekend, drinking, both by ourselves, staring at the computer, or youguessedit...at the bar.  Better yet. I'll start going out by myself, doing my own thing, spending time with my friends, outside of this house, and you'll never see me.  I'll spend my own money, and you won't have to worry about a fucking thing.

I'm sick of drinking. I'm sick of the bar. I'm sick of being fake-broke, or trying to act like I am.  I'm sick of these nonsensical arguments.  I'm sick of this insane money paranoia.  We're not fighting anymore, at this moment, we haven't resolved anything, though.

My plans still stand for the weekend.  And no, they don't include the bar.

Now, I know I am blessed, and have a lot LOT less to complain about than other people, but this money thing has been bearing down slowly since early this year.  In fact, it happens every year, and every year we wind up doing fine. This year it's worse than usual, not the finances, but his attitude towards them.  Not too long ago, we got into a really brutal fight in front of Alden, while we were driving, about money. He was careless with a customer, and they skipped out on a very large bill.  Sheer carelessness, and he knew it.  He was so worked up, he was practically frothing at the mouth.  I asked if there's anything I can do to help him recover the money, like press charges, or help him keep better records. I asked with 100% earnestness, and he flipped his shit so bad, he was driving through a parking lot at about 30 mph, and then slammed on the break, throwing me into the windshield.  Not through, but I banged my face pretty well.  That was about the closest he's come to actually doing me harm. Over money.

He's angry enough to rage.  Not angry enough to do something about it, like save money, or move the house forward, to get it rented, or even like...stop fretting and really evaluate and budget.  This is what scares me. Like his father, which is a real hot-button in this house, any mention of Sr...but, like his father, he's getting more paranoid and insane about money every year.