[4] I'm writing a lot more now.  Sometimes I just need to be kicked into motion.

Insomnia tonight.  Insomnia every "night before". I feel like a kid on Christmas. Too wound up to sleep. I literally started writing a shopping list, for tomorrow, and cleaning the bathroom.  I try to fill the whole day with stuff, because if I sit idle, I'm liable to start biting my nails again.  Who the fuck am I kidding? There is no sitting idle.  There is only nervous energy.

It's a good feeling.  I hope it never wears off.  That anticipation and longing that comes with being in love, and loved.

I thought I was going to write earlier, but playing Borderlands 2 with Tutt and Luiz was offered, so I went with that.  I turned down playing last night, so I could sit in quiet contemplation. I needed it after yesterday.  Tonight was fun.  Sometimes, it's just because I can laugh for two hours straight, and it brings me back to old times, so many times over.  Back to 2005, when Tutt and I first met and created our adventuring team.  Thousands of needless deaths, and like at least fifteen games later, we're still a total horror show.  When we both first started playing Star Wars: The Old Republic, last year, we were both in this lavish city, and we spied some decorative pit in the center, filled with white light.  As one, totally spontaneously, we both went charging for the railing and dove over it...and died.  Luiz went on a 30 minute tirade about our antics, and how we should have grown out of them already.  What can I say? I'm eternally a kid.  Tutt and I have gotten into some hilarious trouble together, and I wouldn't trade that for any amount of headshots in the world.  What are the stories we tell, five, ten years down the line? The fucking funny ones.

I get that Tutt doesn't have a load of joy in his life right now, so I'm glad he's got this escapism.  It's good for all of us.

Looking forward to tomorrow night.  Looking forward to making some Thai food and drinking some Maker's.